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27 Jan 2010 09:26

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Offbeat: The Onion perfectly takes the piss out of the Apple Tablet

  • Okay, yeah, this will work. This will definitely work. Just need to write ‘tablet’ on this little strip of masking tape here and I’m golden. Oh, come on, you piece of #&*#! Just stick already!
  • “Steve Jobs” • In a pitch-perfect Onion article titled “Frantic Steve Jobs Stays Up All Night Designing Apple Tablet.” Wouldn’t it be awesome if Steve Jobs promised unbelievable things then only worked on them the night before, like he was the world’s worst procrastinator? We’d still buy his stuff. source
Posted by Ernie Smith • 0 Comments • Permalink

26 Jan 2010 10:43

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Offbeat: In Japan, cats attack giant bears and win. Awesome!

  • We know that we post a lot of cat videos, but most of them don’t offer the awesome sight of a bear getting shamed by a freaking cat. See that? That’s bear shame. In Japanese. With Japanese captions which we won’t bother translating.
Posted by Ernie Smith • 0 Comments • Permalink

25 Jan 2010 21:25

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Offbeat: Try harder: This 7-year-old biker kid is a Haiti fundraising hero

This British kid’s raised $195,000 for Haiti by riding a bike. AND he’s got the ladies. It’s all downhill from here, little guy. source
Posted by Ernie Smith • 0 Comments • Permalink

25 Jan 2010 11:05

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Offbeat: It’s official: ShortFormBlog has found its business card

  • “Pleasure doing business with you. Ow! Ow! Julius, what are you doing? Are you SHOOTING PENNIES AT ME? Why, I’ll never work with ShortFormBlog ever again. You guys are ShortFormJerks!”
Posted by Ernie Smith • 3 Comments • Permalink

24 Jan 2010 11:18

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Offbeat: Breakups with rich software execs more expensive, more public

  • mistress For eight and a half years, Oracle co-president Charles E. Phillips was cheating on his wife with YaVaughnie Wilkins. He almost got divorced, but never did.
  • breakup After Phillips broke up with Wilkins, Wilkins bought a bunch of billboards about their now-public relationship, complete with a Web site full of love letters. Ouch. source
Posted by Ernie Smith • 0 Comments • Permalink

22 Jan 2010 16:53

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Offbeat: Grand theft auto suspect has a pretty meta taste in video games

  • When police found him, he was playing “Grand Theft Auto.” Michael Ray Ekes likes stealing cars just as much as the next video game fan. Problem is, he’s suspected of doing it in real life. Police arrested Ekes, who was already out on bail for grand theft auto charges, after he was suspected of stealing another car. What can you say? The dude likes stealing cars. source
Posted by Ernie Smith • 0 Comments • Permalink

22 Jan 2010 12:30

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Offbeat: Star Wars Kid, the sequel: An awkward sword expert in a sweatsuit

  • Remember “Star Wars Kid“? It was one of the earliest viral videos and it ruined the kid’s life for a number of years, mainly because he didn’t put it online. This guy is like a grown-up version of “Star Wars Kid,” except he knows how to use his sword and perhaps doesn’t realize how awkward the sweatsuit and ponytail make him look. We look forward to this guy becoming a pop culture phenomenon, too.
Posted by Ernie Smith • 0 Comments • Permalink
 

22 Jan 2010 10:40

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Offbeat: Some hotel/motel/Holiday Inn employee willing to jump in your bed

  • It’s the company’s new human-bed-warming service. When we at the hotel/motel/Holiday Inn, sometimes we get a little cold before tucking in. Fortunately, they have that covered. Someone will jump into your bed in a onesie, lay around, and get the bed warm for you. “The new Holiday Inn bed warmers service is a bit like having a giant hot water bottle in your bed,” the company’s spokeswoman Jane Bednall noted. Can they keep us company, too? We get lonely in hotel rooms sometimes. source
Posted by Ernie Smith • 0 Comments • Permalink

21 Jan 2010 23:24

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Offbeat: This is the stupidest dog we know. She’s basically an idiot.

The Afghan Hound is the stupidest dog of all, a top canine researcher says. The smartest? The border collie. (FYI: Lassie is a collie, but not a border collie.) source
Posted by Ernie Smith • 0 Comments • Permalink

21 Jan 2010 10:22

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Offbeat: Pranking Christians: Funny because they don’t know pop culture!

  • Two clips, two obvious pop culture references, two guys that completely miss them. In the first clip, the guy reads a letter from a man who has the exact same problem as the Fresh Prince of Bel Air. In the second, the letter-writer says that God is a man who rickrolls. Jesus, you guys need to start watching a wider variety of secular TV. Those are blatantly obvious.
Posted by Ernie Smith • 0 Comments • Permalink
 
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