• Let’s just say that Cee-Lo’s message doesn’t get lost in the long trip from Knockout to the high-budget video that’s destined to be played hundreds of times on MTV in neutered form.

• It’s official. Sumo wrestlers have fat fingers. Their fingers are so fat, in fact, that they have to use iPads as phones, because they can’t quite tap on mobile phones OK. So, the Japan Sumo Association decided to give their wrestlers 60 iPads to use. This is funny, sure, but there’s a spying element to this story. See, the league has recently been nailed by scandal recently. Sumo wrestlers like gambling, and who can blame them? Gambling is awesome. source

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• To our friends visiting Washington on August 28th to take part in Glenn Beck’s no-longer-9/12 protests: Here’s your map. (And some guy also made a dead-serious guide, too.) Visit the monuments, but don’t you dare leave the blue zone, or you’ll be in the red zones that signify D.C. You don’t want to be caught dead in Dupont Circle. It’s the ‘hood. source

• The thing is, you feel guilty about complaining since they are doing a good thing for the environment. But you want to snack quietly and you don’t want everyone in the house to know you are eating chips.
• Sun Chips fan Kathy Frederick • On the major annoyance that is the new Sun Chips packaging. See, Frito-Lay, the makers of the chips, started packing them in new compostable bags, which are environmentally friendly but REALLY GOD DAMN LOUD. Loud enough that there’s multiple Facebook pages devoted to the phenomenon. This video puts the whole situation into perspective – the bag is nearly 20 decibels louder than your average chip bag. 95 decibels for a chip bag? And we thought normal chip bags were loud. source

• No chutes here. This lovely German flight attendant (she flies with Lufthansa) watched as her pillow-throwing job turned into a hilarious pillow fight. In the U.S. she would’ve grabbed two beers and gone down a chute. In Germany, they can laugh. Laugh! And laugh some more.

• Look, sometimes you’re hungry. Sometimes you’re emotional. Sometimes you really want some Chicken McNuggets. Sometimes you have to hit an employee. And sometimes you have to smash a window or two. Fair enough. source

• Poor washing machine. It didn’t even know what hit it. The key moment here hits at the 55-second mark, and it somehow adds a human element to the nature of washing machine destruction. LOL. It just turns into a jittering mess. source

• Newspapers still have headlines, of course, but they don’t seem to strive for greatness or to risk flopping anymore, because editors know that when the stories arrive on the Web, even the best headlines will be changed to something dull but utilitarian.
• Washington Post supercolumnist Gene Weingarten • Explaining how newspapers have had to suck the life out of their headlines in pursuit of eyeballs. “Putting well-known names in headlines is considered shrewd, even if creativity suffers,” he writes. Personally, we write our headlines with some focus on SEO, but we’re totally willing to get out of the way of a good joke. One paper that does a good job of mixing SEO and classic headline art is The New York Times, probably because they can afford to. And SEO doesn’t mean you can’t be clever. See the headline Weingarten put on his story: “Gene Weingarten column mentions Lady Gaga.” source