• I don’t want a tomato picked by a Mexican. I want it picked by an American, sliced by a Guatemalan . . . and served in a spa where a Chilean gives me a Brazilian.
• Stephen Colbert • Speaking at today’s House subcommittee hearing on immigration in the U.S. The point being made? That working farm labor jobs, as many illegal immigrants do, is really freaking hard. Colbert knows. He’s tried it before. He suggests it’s a job you, too, should try. “Americans may consider taking jobs once conditions are better,” Colbert said. “I trust both sides will work on this together in best interests of the American people – as you always do. U.S.A., Number 1.” source

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  “Rally to Restore Sanity” Great angle for a rally on Stewart’s part. Perhaps this might inspire a bunch of reasonable people to make a pitch for political reasonableness. On October 30th, we expect to see no “Don’t Tread on Me” flags.
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  “March to Keep Fear Alive” “People should book their hotel rooms now or their children might turn gay!” That’s some pretty stellar fearmongering there, Stephen Colbert. OK, who wants to go? Julius has a couch with your name on it! source

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• But he’s so friendly-looking!No matter. The San Luis Obispo (Calif.) County Sheriff’s Department has warned parents to keep an eye out for this bear, who is described as having a “lecherous nature” and as having been adopted by real pedophiles as a symbol of um, being pedophiles. The article goes on to say that, “Although there have been no reported sightings of the image on the Central Coast, individuals dressed in the bear costume and car decals have been seen in Southern California.” Police don’t understand the Internet! source

• Nobody can hold Roger Ebert down. The notable film critic, whose health problems (and amazing methods of working around them) have warmed the hearts of many in recent years, isn’t letting his condition hold him down. In fact, he’s bringing back his old “Two Thumbs Up” workhorse, this time in a return to its public-television roots. While he won’t be one of the two main critics (AP’s Christy Lemire and NPR’s Elvis Mitchell take those reins), Ebert will be featured in every episode, speaking in his newly-computerized voice. This rules. source

• She’s very protective of it. If it starts to move and she don’t like where its going she’ll reach up and pull it back and start licking it and taking care of it like she would one of her kittens.
• Central Mississippi T.A.I.L.S. organizer Jim Watson • On their cat, Emmy, who has adopted a squirrel. Not only has she adopted said squirrel, but the squirrel has even started purring. “Oh the squirrel, you can pick it up and pet it and it will start to purr just like a kitten does,” Watson said. Nothing more to add except for this: There’s video at the link. THERE’S VIDEO AT THE LINK. (Thanks Nick Snider for the link.) source

• Ad people get to have more fun than you. See, a British ad firm working for IKEA got to fill one of their stores with a bunch of cats and tape it. Can you believe that this is someone’s job?Awww. (Thanks Andrew Ottoson) source

The backstory behind Maya

• Hey there, here’s a photo of my cat, Maya, when she was a kitten. It’s just so awesome I want the whole world to see!
• Reader Chris Gorman • Regarding the awesomeness of his cat, Maya. And trust us. This cat lives up to the hype, looking ultra-dignified in the pic above, waiting for her moment in the sun. Here’s your moment, Maya. Savor it.

• In front of a backbeat that we can best describe as “underwater reggae,” Deerhunter’s new song, “Helicopter,” doesn’t blaze like the band’s most well-known hits (“Strange Lights,” “Never Stops,” “Nothing Ever Happened”), but if nothing else seems to suggest that the band might have yet another artistic breakthrough in them. It’s them and Animal Collective at the top of the indie game, and based on this, they deserve it.