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09 Jul 2009 20:31

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Offbeat: Fewer calories means longer life, fewer Frappuccinos

  • They tested it on primates. Seriously. Admit it, you like eating. And not just anything. Absolute garbage. Drinks with more calories than many meals. Burgers loaded with layer upon layer of meat, cheese, secret sauce … you get the idea. Well, if you want to live longer, maybe you shouldn’t. According to a study that involved cutting calories of monkeys, they found just 13% of monkeys who had their calorie intake limited died during the 20-year testing period, versus 37% of monkeys who chose to gorge as much as they wanted. So, next time … get the small Frappuccino, and thank us later. source

08 Jul 2009 22:27

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Offbeat, World: “Kim Jong Ale” shows us the softer side of propaganda

  • Apparently North Korea isn’t all about making plans to rule the world. A new ad run on state television (with predictably *awesome* graphics) promotes beer drinking, saying it gives you good health and contains protein. Now that’s something we could totally get behind. source

07 Jul 2009 10:07

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Offbeat: Tomorrow’s a big day for people who like sequential dates

  • 123456789 No, really guys source

06 Jul 2009 23:17

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Offbeat: i can haz bible?

  • An he was liek wtf? ur dead bruda iz mewin frum undr teh carpt. (Ceiling Cat haz totally xlnt hearing An stuf.)
  • An excerpt from Genesis 4 • according to the lolcat Bible Translation Project. The brains behind “I Can Haz Cheeseburger?” started the crowdsourcing scheme in July 2007 and so far have almost finished the Old and New Testaments. They haz lotsa time and cheeseburgers to do dis.  • source

06 Jul 2009 21:43

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Offbeat: Shepard Smith: Favorite car chase play-by-play dude EVAH!

  • “Caravan 5, spike strips nothing.” We have huge admiration for Shepard Smith, the one guy on Fox News who’s unafraid to tell it like it is. But man, we wonder to ourselves sometimes whether he should be calling baseball games instead of car chases. Because he’s so hilarious with his phrasing that you just want to give Shep a high-five.source

06 Jul 2009 17:05

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Culture, Offbeat: Didn’t win a ticket to Michael Jackson’s funeral? Try scalping.

  • $15,000 the reported amount people are bidding for tickets on eBay. Event organizers say they won’t be welcome. source

06 Jul 2009 09:48

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Offbeat: We’re having a hard time coming up with a joke about this coffee

  • 900 boxes of Viagra-laced coffee seized in Malaysia source
 

04 Jul 2009 18:53

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Offbeat: Joey Chestnut sure knows how to down lots of hot dogs

  • 68 wieners in one competitive sitting. That’s a record source

04 Jul 2009 12:48

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Offbeat: We got these fireworks from South of the Border

Weird part? They were shaped like mushrooms. They don’t make a huge blast, and that blast sounds … uh, pixelated. But happy 4th, everyone! source

03 Jul 2009 21:49

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Offbeat: Turkish TV turns the search for God into a game show

  • We are giving the biggest prize in the world, the gift of belief in God. … We don’t approve of anyone being an atheist. God is great and it doesn’t matter which religion you believe in. The important thing is to believe.
  • Kanal T CEO Seyhan Soylu • On why his television network is hosting a game show called “Penitents Compete,” which tries to convince a bunch of atheists that you need to have religion of some kind in your life. Religious leaders in the country are skeptical. “Religion should not be a subject for entertainment programs,” said Hamza Aktan, chairman of the High Board of Religious Affairs. Our question: When does Fox bring this show to the States? • source