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18 May 2009 20:15

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Politics, U.S.: Mike Huckabee’s a poet and we didn’t even know it!

  • Here’s a story about a lady named Nancy / A ruthless politician, but dressed very fancy / Very ambitious, she got herself elected Speaker / But as for keeping secrets, she proved quite a ‘leaker.’
  • Former Arkansas governor Mike Huckabee • Who wrote a wonderfully jerkish poem called “Fancy Nancy” about embattled Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi, who has faced a bit of drama lately about harsh interrogation techniques. If you think this poem is good, you should see what good ol’ Mike has to say about Nantucket. • source

18 May 2009 10:30

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Culture, World: We don’t get Eurovision. We hope maybe you guys do.

  • Alexander Rybak of Norway won it all – and then some – with this song called “Fairytale.” It’s good to know that there’s a violin-playing European equivalent to Ricky Martin. It helps us sleep better at night.source

18 May 2009 10:23

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Sports: Congrats to the Bahstin Celtics for blowing it to the Orlando Magic

  • “Every time we got it down to seven or four they made another big shot,” said Doc Rivers. “I mean, they’re a hell of a basketball team, and they played probably their best game.”
  • Boston Celtics coach Doc Rivers • Whose team went from force of nature to merely pretty good in the last year. Granted, losing Kevin Garnett to injury didn’t help their cause, but let’s just say we expected better of them. • source

18 May 2009 10:18

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U.S.: Joe Biden apparently revealed his secret hideout. *facepalm*

  • It’s supposed to keep him safe in the event of a terror attack. The Vice President, at a dinner party, admitted the existence of a secret bunker under the U.S. Naval Observatory. It’s believed to be Biden’s own personal batcave, designed to keep him safe if Batman (Obama) is in danger. At this point, we’re wondering if Robin would be the right guy to run the country. source

18 May 2009 10:03

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Tech: If you like “Guitar Hero” (or even if you don’t) get ready for a glut of it

  • 5 “Hero”-branded games will get released to consoles this year source

18 May 2009 09:57

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World: The Tamil Tigers’ leader was killed, Sri Lanka sez

  • Velupillai Prabhakaran founded the Tamil Tigers, who have been the spark point for a lengthy civil war in Sri Lanka. The Tigers are considered a terrorist organization in 32 countries. source
  • Prabhakaran apparently was killed while attempting to run. After 30-plus years, the Tigers agreed to rest their arms this weekend, effectively ending the longest civil war in Asia. source

18 May 2009 09:47

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Culture: According to this poll, “American Idol” really needs Simon Cowell

  • 49% say they’d no longer watch without him; he’s considering leaving source
 

18 May 2009 09:41

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U.S.: Students at Intermediate School 238 lose Mr. Weiner to swine flu

  • The assistant principal died last night of H1N1. In Hollis, Queens, students are mourning the death of Mitchell Wiener to swine flu – making him the fifth overall death in the U.S. and the first in New York City. He had been in the hospital in critical condition for half a week beforehand. So basically, this is very sad. source

18 May 2009 09:32

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World: Myanmar political prisoner Aung San Suu Kyi goes to trial

No, this isn’t the lady who went to jail because some crazy guy showed up at her doorstep. This is a protester who looks like her. source

18 May 2009 09:07

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U.S.: Obama handles the Notre Dame abortion hot potato with ease

  • When we open up our hearts and our minds to those who may not think precisely like we do or believe precisely what we believe, that’s when we discover at least the possibility of common ground.
  • President Barack Obama • Who deftly handled a fairly tense situation speaking at the University of Notre Dame, which as a Catholic institution doesn’t support abortion, by asking those involved in protests around his visit to find common points of agreement. Obama is pro-choice, which meant that he became a lightning rod when the university picked him as commencement speaker. With the speech, Obama seemed to soften the protests against him. • source