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04 Mar 2011 01:46

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Offbeat: “Heart Attack Grill” ironically loses spokesperson to “mild death”

  • Protip to all greasy burger joints: If you want to promote your product, you probably shouldn’t use an incredibly fat guy to satirically promote a “diet” designed around gluttonous pursuits, and then suggest that said diet might lead to “mild death.” Which is why we’re writing about our boy Blair River right now. Yes, he died. It was sad. He was only 29. While it’s rumored it was because of flu/pneumonia symptoms, everyone is going to think his weight – 575 pounds on a 6-foot-8 frame – had something to do with it, even if it didn’t. Which, as an end effect, may lead the Heart Attack Grill to lose a few customers. To put it lightly. (thanks nhaler) source
Posted by Ernie Smith • 0 Comments • Permalink

28 Oct 2010 22:23

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Biz: Get rich quick scheme: Suing McDonald’s for making you fat

  • 12 x 65 = the number of years a Brazilian McDonald’s employee worked at the restaurant, and the number of pounds he gained while working there
  • $17,500 the size of the judgment for the Brazilian, who should have a Marie Claire article written about how ugly he is any day now source
Posted by Ernie Smith • 0 Comments • Permalink

26 Oct 2010 20:39

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Culture: Marie Claire forced into mea culpa over anti-obesity blog post

  • So anyway, yes, I think I’d be grossed out if I had to watch two characters with rolls and rolls of fat kissing each other … because I’d be grossed out if I had to watch them doing anything.
  • Marie Claire writer Maura Kelly • Basically calling fat people ugly and claiming that they’re at fault for their conditions. Kelly, who was responding to a CNN article about Hollywood’s treatment of plus-size characters in TV shows, went on to claim that “obesity is something that most people have a ton of control over” and offered advice to people to lose weight. The result? Well, she’s pretty much the most hated woman on the Internet today, was forced to respond to the article to apologize profusely, and should probably never write anything ever again. Listen, Maura, Julius may have a few extra pounds on his torso, but he’s not going to take your abuse! Say one more word and he’s gonna chase you down with a Twinkie or one of those dumbbells he never uses. source
Posted by Ernie Smith • 0 Comments • Permalink

15 Mar 2010 18:50

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Offbeat: Dear morbidly obese woman: What you’re doing isn’t honorable

Meet Donna Simpson, who’s TRYING to become the world’s fattest woman. At 12,000 calories a day, her svelte 600-pound frame should be up to 1,000 in no time flat. source
Posted by Ernie Smith • 8 Comments • Permalink

16 Feb 2010 10:15

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Culture: Kevin Smith knows exactly when to play the “I’m fat” card

  • 2008 Just days before the release of “Zach and Miri Make a Porno,” Smith told the L.A. Times that he broke a toilet. He milked it.
  • 2010 Just days before the release of “CopOut,” Southwest Airlines booted Smith off a flight for being way too fat. He milked it. source
Posted by Ernie Smith • 1 Comment • Permalink

14 Feb 2010 21:28

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Culture: Southwest Airlines throws off the wrong fat guy: Kevin Smith

  • Hey @SouthwestAir I’ve landed in Burbank. Don’t worry: wall of the plane was opened & I was airlifted out while Richard Simmons supervised.
  • Director Kevin Smith • Regarding a harrowing experience where he was booted from a flight because he was too fat, according to the pilot. He later got on another flight, but not before he tweeted about it to his 1.6 million followers on Twitter. The director, who helmed the upcoming Bruce Willis/Tracy Morgan awesomefest CopOut, says he’s not that fat yet. In case you’re wondering, Southwest responded, claiming they’ve had the “persons of size” policy for 25 years now. Our question: Where’s your private jet, Silent Bob? source
Posted by Ernie Smith • 0 Comments • Permalink

13 Feb 2010 13:21

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U.S.: Fat children apparently “set” as fat kids at really early ages

  • 50% of overweight teens were overweight by 24 months of age
  • 90% of overweight teens were overweight by 5 years of age source
Posted by Ernie Smith • 0 Comments • Permalink
 

22 Nov 2009 20:29

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U.S.: Wince-worthy: A super-sized man dies after being cut out of a chair

  • 900 pounds Daniel Webb’s weight before he died last week
  • nine months the amount of time he was stuck inside a La-Z-Boy chair source
Posted by Ernie Smith • 0 Comments • Permalink

20 Nov 2009 23:08

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World: Sick: Peruvian gang kills people for their fat for some reason

  • “We are not making this up. They have confessed to this. That’s what’s coming out now.” In case you’re Peruvian and were wondering where your fat friend went recently, it’s possible that he’s one of 60 people who may have been killed for his fat. Four gang members were arrested in the incredibly bizarre scheme, which reportedly netted them $15,000 per liter of fat from European labs. We smell a plot to a horror movie. source
Posted by Ernie Smith • 0 Comments • Permalink
 
 
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