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15 Jan 2010 08:52

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Biz: Banks say screw populism, increase bonuses by 18% for 2009

  • $145 billion in dollar-shaped middle fingers source

14 Jan 2010 11:04

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Biz: Hey bookies, looking to bet on who gets Cadbury? Look here

  • 66% the odds that Cadbury goes to Kraft, who will produce a Vegemite-flavored Cadbury Egg for Australia
  • 15% the odds that Cadbury goes to Hershey, which is half the size but knows how to mix chocolate and peanut butter
  • 19% the odds that Cadbury doesn’t go with either suitor and decides to lay its own Cadbury Eggs source

14 Jan 2010 10:39

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Biz, U.S.: Obama’s bank plan: Lots of money for the U.S., with perks!

  • $90 billion in bank taxes over the next ten years source
  • So what happens if the banks overpay the bailouts? Simple. The money goes back to the U.S. to help strengthen the financial position that was screwed up by the bailout crisis. Did someone say “win-win” situation, kids? The banks don’t think so, by the way, and angrily responded to the new charges like petulant children who didn’t get a Nintendo 64 for Christmas.

14 Jan 2010 09:48

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Biz: Retail unexpectedly sucked last month; jobs sucked last week

  • -0.3% decline in retail sales in December; a growth of 0.5% was expected during the holidays
  • +11,000 increase in jobess claims last week; it wasn’t supposed to be quite that high source

13 Jan 2010 11:07

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Biz, U.S.: Obama has a plan to get back TARP funds: Tax the bastards

  • 20 of the biggest banks will now bail out the government source

12 Jan 2010 11:06

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Biz, Music: eMusic signs another major label, Warner Music. Hooray!

  • 10,000 new R.E.M. songs to buy source

12 Jan 2010 11:00

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Biz: Kraft/Cadbury merger: Chocolate & cheese candy bar closer to reality

  • Kraft only needs to improve their offer slightly to push through the deal. Kraft’s hostile takeover seems closer to reality than ever despite the fact that Cadbury had a solid 2009. Kraft needs to work fast, though – they have seven days to raise their offer to something a little more crumbelievable. source
 

12 Jan 2010 10:52

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Biz: Delta screws over travelers by raising checked baggage prices

  • $23 new price for the first freaking bag
  • $32 new price for the second bag
  • $7-8 increase in prices from before source

12 Jan 2010 10:41

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Biz: Reward for risk: The Federal Reserve made a huge profit in 2009

  • $46.1 billion the size of the Federal Reserve’s profits in 2009
  • $14.4 billion the increase in the Fed’s profits from 2008 source
  • Why the increase? Simple. The Fed lowered its standards and became the buyer of last resort, buying assets nobody else wanted, and getting profits from those assets. In case you’re wondering, by the way, they dump these profits back to the Treasury.

11 Jan 2010 21:32

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Biz: Obama’s thinking of charging Wall Street service fees. Hm.

  • That’s one way to get our money back from the banks. A year after being handed one of the worst financial crises to ever hit the U.S., Obama’s considering his options for making something back on that $700 billion investment that George W. Bush made back in the day. The one that’s standing out? Charging fees to companies like AIG and Bank of America. The nature of that fee hasn’t been decided yet, but we bet taxpayers might enjoy the just desserts. source