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24 Feb 2011 21:34


Biz: General Motors’ good year: Their first full-year profit since ’04

  • $100 billion the amount GM lost between 2005 and 2009, when they had to be bailed out by the feds
  • $4.7 billion the amount they earned in 2010 – they’re doing the Dougie in the boardroom today source
  • » It’s not all up-and-up, though: At $510 million, the company’s fourth-quarter numbers, while still profitable, paled in comparison to the rest of the year. Still though, the fact that it’s a profit is definitely Dougie-worthy, no matter how you look at it.

19 Jan 2011 11:11


Biz: Goldman Sachs has crappy quarter; sucks to be them

  • 53% the dip in Goldman Sachs’ fourth-quarter profits (after many hugely profitable quarters last year)
  • 39% the decline in Goldman’s bond-trading revenue; Goldman blamed “generally low client activity levels”
  • 2.5% the decline in their stock this morning, which has generally been strong during the financial crisis source

18 Jan 2011 22:09


Biz, Tech: Steve Jobs may be sick, but Apple’s still killin’ profit expectations

  • Want to know the best way to get investors off your back about your iconic CEO’s illness? Post numbers that make everyone criticizing you look like chumps. That’s what Apple did today. And even though Steve is still sick (and hopefully he’s able to deal with that without a problem), the numbers suggest that Apple does so much right that it’ll be hard for them to screw up the next couple of quarters. Just to give you kids an idea:
  • $22 billion in revenues in the first quarter for Apple (very good)
  • 2% the increase in Apple’s stock after Apple’s numbers were released, nearly erasing earlier Jobs-illness-related losses
  • 4:5 the number of Fortune 500 companies currently field testing the increasingly-popular iPad – suggesting further success
  • 16.2M the number of iPhones Apple sold, which is way up from a year ago
  • 7.33M the number of iPads they sold – an extremely robust number
  • 4.1M the number of Macs they sold – also way up from a year ago source

07 Dec 2010 22:54


Biz: The U.S. sold off its last Citi shares; how’d we do on that bailout?

  • 0 the number of Citi shares the U.S. owns as of today; good riddance
  • $45B the amount of money the U.S. infused in Citi during the great bailout crisis of 2008
  • $57B the proceeds the U.S. made on the bailout investment (golf clap; good show, chaps)
  • $12B the amount the U.S. has profited from Citi – wait, we made money on a bailout? source

10 Nov 2010 09:48


Biz: Bailed-out (and profitable!) General Motors kicking butt these days

  • $2 billion in profits for GM in the third quarter alone (*golf clap*)

Three reasons why this is good news:


  • one It’s shaping up to be their first profitable year since 2004 – long before we heard anything about auto industry bailouts.
  • two Most of the profits came from North America, where the company has been fairly weak in recent years. (Too many SUVs.)
  • three GM has an IPO coming very soon, and a solid performance like this bodes well for their return to stocks. source

02 Nov 2010 10:29


Biz: BP somehow posts profit, despite massive Gulf Oil Spill cost

  • $40
    the amount BP has set aside for paying for this oil spill (over two separate quarters) – bigger than many countries’ GDP
  • $1.79
    the company’s profit third-quarter profit, despite a $7.7 billion spill-related charge – it’s insanely impressive they have one at all source

14 Oct 2010 20:57


Biz, Tech: Based on its profits, Google’s freewheeling spending warranted

  • $2.17 the size of Google’s profits this quarter
  • 25% boost in Google’s overall revenues last quarter – not bad, considering all that extracurricular spending
  • 9% jump in stock price on the news; put that in your self-driving car’s tailpipe and smoke it source

12 Aug 2010 10:27


Biz: GM’s profits: Here’s your beacon of hope, depressed investors

  • $1.3 billion in profits this quarter, the best since 2004 source

27 Jul 2010 08:49


Biz: BP’s quarterly losses huge – hey, just like the oil spill!

  • $17.2 billion the size of BP’s quarterly loss, their first since the oil spill
  • $32.2 billion the size of the pretax charge they took due to the oil spill source

23 Jul 2010 13:53


Biz: Ford makes it five straight quarters of actual profit

  • $2.6 billion in profits this quarter; who needs a bailout? source