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18 Sep 2009 22:33

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Offbeat: The most believable congregation in history doesn’t congregate

  • The Calvary Nudist Baptist Church isn’t real. Mark Johnson, how could you lie to us! Your referencing of biblical passages to promote the idea of free-flowing nudity in church services was funny, and we believed it was real (in the way that one believes the tooth fairy is real). So, Tyler, Texas, your claim to fame remains … being known as the “Rose Capital of America.” But you could have been so much more … naked. (Thanks to Darren Benson for the protip.) source

18 Sep 2009 19:13

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Offbeat: If you’re in Tyler, Tx., stop by the Calvary Nudist Baptist Church

  • We are lambs before the Lord, and every Sunday we give thanks to Him with all of our body and soul. And it includes the sacrifice of our garments, for it was when Eve ate from the Tree of Life and gathered fig leaves that mankind fell into sin.
  • Pastor Mark Johnson (heh heh, you said “Johnson”) • On why his church thinks that nudity is awesome. Johnson says that the nudity angle of his Texas church isn’t an attempt to recreate “hedonistic, recreational lifestyles,” but an attempt to appreciate Jesus in a super-devoted way. Dude. you’re embarrassing yourself. (We’re not kidding. The photo on his site shows the dude bare-chested and everything.) But you’re doing it for Jesus, so we guess it’s OK. • source